I’ve had so many conversations with high-achieving women (especially moms) who:

  • Won’t hire a cleaner because it feels too indulgent… but struggle to juggle housework, career, and kids
  • Spend tons of money on their kids’ summer camps and extracurricular activities… but can’t justify paying for a girls’ weekend
  • Splurge on their partner or kids… but won’t splurge on that outfit or bracelet they’ve wanted forever

I get it. I’ve been there myself.

When I got divorced and was juggling a demanding career and being a single mom half the time, I struggled! I was trying to show up as the best version of myself at work while packing lunches, getting dinner on the table, managing my house, and there was literally nothing left over for me.

I’d joke, “I’m great at balancing work and kids… there’s just zero balance for me.” But the truth was, this was no joke. This was my reality. And the result was exhaustion and a toll on my health.

Saying ‘yes’ to yourself is not just a nice-to-have; it’s necessary to create the life you truly want.

And saying yes is more than self-care. It means saying yes to:

  • Development opportunities that will help you accelerate your career
  • Splurging on beautiful things because it makes you feel special
  • Time with friends and loved ones to fill your cup
  • Exercise and healthy food to nourish your body
  • Asking for that raise or promotion because you deserve it!

Why We Struggle to Put Ourselves First

It’s not your fault you feel guilty! Decades of social conditioning reward women for self-sacrifice. As a result:

  • 1 in 5 women feel guilty taking just one hour for themselves
  • Married women are 4× more likely to feel selfish about personal time than single women
  • Moms are 6× more likely to feel guilty about self-care than women without kids

But when you opt out of investing in yourself, you’re sending your brain a message that says, “I’m not worth it.” This constant message to your brain erodes your confidence and can cost you opportunity.

Think about it. When you say no to yourself, you miss out on development opportunities, you feel resentful and drained, and you may even miss out on financial upside.

The first time I ever invested a significant amount of my own money in myself was at a $4K mastermind retreat. I’ll be honest, it felt soooo indulgent! I felt guilty leaving my family, and I almost didn’t go. But it paid off 10x and completely changed my view on these investments.

Here’s the hard truth: you’re allowed to want rest. You’re allowed to indulge. You’re allowed to want more money simply because you want it. You’re allowed to splurge on yourself. You’re allowed to invest in your growth.

I’m giving you permission right now.

Why Prioritizing You Is Non-Negotiable

Prioritizing yourself is about more than preventing burnout. There are so many benefits to living this way. Here are 3:

  • Boosts your confidence. Every hour or dollar you invest in yourself reinforces your worth and trains your mind to expect more for yourself.
  • Fuels your growth. Whether it’s a new skill, a mastermind call, or a simple spa afternoon, self-care sparks creativity, resilience, and performance.
  • Accelerates your income. Studies show people who invest in development earn higher raises and promotions. (Yes, you deserve more money simply for leveling up!)

A Simple Reframe for Today

If you struggle to say yes to yourself, here are 3 things you can try to turn this around:

  1. Permission Slip: Write down “I am allowed to want rest, money & joy” and tape it somewhere you’ll see it.
  2. Micro-Invest: Schedule one 30-minute block this week just for you—no apologies.
  3. Financial Reminder: Treat your next $50 purchase as an investment in YOU, not an indulgence. Notice how it feels to spend with intention.

Take the Next Step

Time to get real: If you’re ready to move beyond guilt and truly invest in the leader (and life) you deserve, let’s chat:

Choose you – no guilt, all gain.

Until next time friends… ✌️💜

Katy