I recently had a really interesting conversation with Deb Liu, President & CEO of Ancestry (the world’s largest genealogy company). To give you some context, before joining Ancestry, Deb held leadership roles at Paypal, eBay, and Facebook. She’s also on the Intuit Board of Directors. Oh, and one of the key sponsors in her career was Sheryl Sandberg.
The woman knows a thing or two about creating an impressive career and breaking the glass ceiling.
Our conversation focused on mentorship vs. sponsorship for women, and it was eye-opening. I had never really thought much about the difference between the two, and as it turns out, it matters!
So in today’s newsletter, I’m going to share:
- The difference between mentors and sponsors
- Why men tend to have more sponsors than women
- What we, as women, can do about this
Let’s dive in…
As a woman, I’ve heard the advice to ‘get a mentor’ more times than I can count. Sound familiar?
Here’s the thing: Women have no problem getting mentors. In fact, we tend to have more mentors than men in our careers, which kind of shocked me. However, although men have fewer mentors, they have more sponsors than we do, and that’s not great for women.
The concept to understand is the difference between mentors and sponsors.
A mentor is simply someone who gives you advice. Typically it’s based on their own learnings and experience. But that’s where the relationship ends. They aren’t personally invested in you.
A sponsor, on the other hand, is someone willing to use their political capital and put their reputation on the line to help you. They want to see you succeed and are invested in your success. The fact that they will vouch for you opens new doors that would not have been open to you otherwise.
Sponsorship will help you gain access to new opportunities and increase the probability that you’re given a shot at something you’ve never done before.
Why do men have more sponsors than women?
The reason men tend to have more sponsors is simple—sponsorship tends to happen organically, and we tend to want to help people who remind us of ourselves in the past. This is called the affinity bias. So senior men look at young, up-and-coming men and see themselves 10 or 20 years ago and want to help that person.
They are less likely to see themselves in a young woman. This, of course, creates a huge issue because it perpetuates the gender gap that already exists. More senior men sponsoring men will pave the way for more men in leadership.
There are changes that need to happen systematically and at the leadership level to fix this, but the million dollar question is:
What can we, as women, do to help ourselves?
One thing we can do is to turn mentors into sponsors. And this is possible with some intentional action.
First, close the loop after getting advice. Often we get advice and never follow up with our mentor to share whether we took it and what happened. If you want this person to be invested in you, they need to see some ROI from working together. And that can be as simple as you sharing that you took their advice and what the outcome was.
As someone who’s been on both sides of this, I always loved it when those I mentored would take action based on my advice and then follow up with me afterward. It lets your mentor know that you value the advice they’ve shared.
Once you close the loop, you can ask what the next piece of advice they have is, and so on. Turn this into an ongoing relationship.
Over time, this will build your relationship with this person and create a solid foundation of trust. At that point, you can make an ask, which may be as simple as, “What else should I be doing that I may not have thought about?” or “Do you know of any opportunities I could get involved with to help advance my goals?”. Chances are, this person may not have thought about this, but when prompted, they can come up with ways to open a door for you.
That’s sponsorship.
Now, what if you don’t have a great network of mentors that you can turn into sponsors? This is also something you can impact through intentional action.
Look at your network and individuals who you may not know personally but are a second connection. Reach out to them with a specific, well-defined ask.
For example, a company I worked at previously was part of an accelerator program, and I recall hearing one of their presenters who really impressed me. This person was ahead of where I was, and had built a sales organization similar to what I was trying to create. I reached out to a mutual connection and asked for an introduction, and then asked this person if they’d be willing to get on a 30-minute call with me to answer some specific questions about the sales org I was building. I came to the call prepared with my questions and did my homework, so I didn’t waste this person’s time.
In contrast, had I just asked this person to ‘mentor me,’ he may not have responded the same way. Have a specific ask and come prepared for your call to impress this person. They’ll be much more willing to continue helping you this way.
If you’re nervous about asking someone you don’t know or barely know for help, remember that if you don’t ask the answer is always ‘no’. And the truth is, many people who have had successful careers are happy to give back! Will everyone you ask say yes? Probably not! But a good number of them will.
Most people who have had highly successful careers can name sponsors who gave them opportunities. Being intentional about creating these relationships in your own career is just smart.
BTW, if you want to read the Forbes article that I published as a result of my conversation with Deb, you can find it here.
Until next time friends… ✌️💜
Katy
