Growing up, we had enough, but not much extra. “We can’t afford it” was a phrase I heard a lot.
I remember in grade 5 or 6, a wealthier friend of mine invited me to visit her condo in Florida over March break. All we had to pay was the $400 flight. When I asked my parents, my mum looked at me with such disappointment and broke the news – “We can’t afford it.”
Fast forward to today, and my kids have every opportunity they could want. Whether that’s paying for a school to help my eldest thrive or sending my middle son to sports camps all summer. My youngest has already visited multiple countries on various family vacations and he just turned 5!
As I reflect on the life I’ve built and where I came from, I can see what’s had the biggest impact.
But before we get into that… Did you know that if you look at the factors that determine your future wealth, your Zip code is one of the biggest?
Here’s why: When you’re surrounded by successful or wealthy people, it rubs off on you. You see what’s possible. You believe you can achieve it.
In fact, I would say our belief system about money and ‘success’ is a bigger predictor than intelligence or raw talent. And much of this belief system is shaped by the people you interact with.
The people I’ve surrounded myself with have been the single biggest factor in helping me shed my own limiting beliefs and step into my full potential, and today I want to share how so you can find the groups of people you need to get to the next level – whatever that means for you.
There are multiple times in my career where this has made a difference for me, but here are the big 3:
1. Mentors
I was lucky early in my career to have mentors who would talk with me about money and how to earn it. I discovered that in the start-up world, it was very possible to make more money than I had ever expected.
I went from believing in modest income gains to understanding just how possible it is to become a self-made millionaire, even when working for other people.
Having individuals in your life to have these conversations with and who normalize the idea of making money, becoming an executive or starting a business allow you to believe it’s possible.
2. Peer Groups
When I finally got to senior leadership, I realized something I hadn’t expected. It was so lonely! I certainly wasn’t going to share too much with my VP colleagues or tell them that sometimes I wasn’t sure what I was doing or whether I belonged there, and the people in my home life didn’t understand what my job even was.
What really changed the game for me was joining a peer group as an EVP, where our conversations were more intentional and the goal of the group was to support and help one another. When I needed advice on what to do work-wise they mentored me. When I needed support because I was feeling lost or unsure, they supported me. And vice versa. I felt as though I belonged.
This had such a profound impact on me that I vowed to create these groups in the world. And this is a key reason that my Own Your Seat at the Table program is a group program. Yes, I’ll help you get promoted and thrive as a leader. But do you know what else I give you? A supportive community of women who actually get it. Invaluable.
3. Masterminds
I didn’t discover masterminds until I became a business owner, and boy, do I wish I had invested in my development sooner.
Mentors helped me believe I could ride the wave of a great tech company and become an exec.
My peer group helped me know I wasn’t alone and gave me tangible advice to be a better leader.
But masterminds completely shifted my thinking about what’s possible for me and how successful I can ultimately be. Amazingly, my business has followed. Why?
Getting in rooms with people doing or who have done what you want to do shows you it’s possible. Even better, you often realize that the ones living your dream are just regular people… so if they can do it, why can’t you? Spoiler alert: you can.
Not only that, the people in the room are willing to teach you what they did to get where they are today.
If you’re working a 9-5, joining a business mastermind probably doesn’t make sense (and the investment is usually in the multiple 5-figures), but that doesn’t mean you can’t invest in yourself and get in the room with people who inspire you and can teach you to do what they’ve done.
And because I wanted to make an experience like this available to professional women, I created the Own The Room Summit, which is happening in Toronto next week (Aug 22nd). This is your last chance to grab a ticket and potentially change your entire career (I hope you do it!).
The sheer act of investing in getting to where you want to go is a game changer. I can’t stress that enough.
So the question to ask yourself is this:
Do I want to stay in the cozy boundaries of the belief system I grew up with? Or do I want to stretch those boundaries to make room for something bigger?
I don’t care if your parents made minimum wage or were multi-millionaires. If you want a seat at the table, you can get one. It’s that simple.
So, to recap:
- You probably have some limiting beliefs around your success level based on how you grew up.
- Getting into rooms with the right people will help you change those beliefs.
- Only YOU get to decide the future that you want, and only YOU can make it happen.
